Memories of mine
Monday, March 29, 2010 7:38 AM
4 years in an instant. Passed like the speed of light-3*10^8(hideously fast)...Been through a lot since the first day i steeped into this school. Experience a lot , nice memories after-all , thank you to god. You have been in my class for all 4 years. But i feel like this year is the only year i get to met you and know you better.
Recall back to the first time i met you , calling you 'rabbit tooth' . Just being childish and didn't realise it hurts and annoyed you. I think i haven't even apologize to you after so long. I'm so sorry , please forgive me from the bottom of my heart. LOL. It's kind of late to say this now but just want to say this.
Maybe if i didn't do all that last time , things might have changed now. Its was just grotesque foolishness of me to do all that and i really regrets now.
I will just let nature take it's toll for now.
Saturday, March 13, 2010 8:03 AM
Physically , my heart is warm.
However , i felt cold and empty.
Life is like a dream.
A dream that seems to last forever.
But who knows when u might wake up from it?
Future is always enclosed in darkness.
Who knows whether we might get knock down while crossing the road tomorrow?
Who knows whether some accidents will happen in the near future?
Dream is never reality.
We born with nature and go with nature.
We should treasure our time in this dream, for it may be the last dream that we will ever had.
Live for life , and Life will live for you.
We should always embed this deeply in our hearts.
However , this seems impossible for me.
For i , live for you , but you ignore me.
I'm just being naive and of course,
I know I'm utterly stupid,
for i've fallen for you.....
Autumn in Singapore
Monday, March 8, 2010 3:37 AM
I walked through this piece of land, surrounded by trees.
The wind gently swift through the air , quietness surrounds the land,
creating a serenity atmosphere that warmly embrace me.
Gentle winds make the leave rust and fall slowly , slowly drifting to the ground.
I stood still in the middle of this land , gasp at the beautiful sight right before me.
My mind became as still as water , my heart became as clear as crystal.
I had only one wish for that moment , forgetting all my desires in this world
in exchange for this 1 wish that will never happen.
My wish---I want to share this beautiful sight with you and hope that time stops there for me.......
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Process of waiting
Sunday, March 7, 2010 7:28 AM
Though you said it clearly and directly,
that you never hold any feelings for me
I'm still waiting for you , waiting for you to accept me.
After all i have decided to wait for you, because....
Forgetting about you is just too impossible and painful for me.
I knew that i never had any chances to begin with,
but i'm willing to wait and hope that there might be a slightest glimpse of hope.
I'm prepared to embrace myself for the your rejection.
Though i knew this , still i'm willing to do it.
This is thoroughly bitter.
Forever and ever......
...
Pains
Wednesday, March 3, 2010 5:20 AM
It's so painful.
I hope someone, someone out there in this endless vast world understands the pain.
Just surviving for a day , it's frustrating , painful.
You stabbed my heart with your words , I try not to show it.
I try to act normally , but you are the one who made the situation more awkward.
This morning , i walked to school with the maroon sky above me.
The sky look so beautiful , an ultimate combination of maroon with the vast ocean of grayish-blue sky.
At the same time , it brings out a hollow feeling , a deep and hollow feeling that no one would understand.
It resonates through my heart, corresponding with it , pitied it , and share my feelings.
credits to scatteredView's for photo
I tried to divert all my focus by indulging myself with piles of school work, to forget about all of it.
But is it really so easy to forget all of this?
I think after all , i will still like you regardless of what you said.
I will just let time take it's course until my memories of you becomes so vague,
that i no longer remember anything about you.
Of course this is going to take years , while i suffered silently everyday, keeping all of this as silent as i could .....
..
The Starting-Ending Point
Tuesday, March 2, 2010 7:25 AM
Though i act as if nothing had happened ,
Deep inside , unspeakable words tormented me.
Art of 1 tear flowing? Art of crying? No more of that sort.
It's become art of watery eyes.
Wanted to cry , but tears just wont flow down.
Pain , agony , filled me up to the brim.
This is more than words can describe.
I feel like screaming out loud , how painful it is...
But consequences just got the better of me.
Physical pain ? It can never be compared to this.
Feeling pain , but noting can be done.
Feeling frustrated , but i can't show it.
Feeling sad , i can't expressed it.
All i can do is to swallow all of this, deep down in my heart,
Bury all of it in 1 corner and try to forget about this.
But reality isn't as forgiving as this.
Some things just can't be forgotten ,
They will forever be in your mind,
tormenting us till the day we bring it down to our graves.
Eternally...hope this will happen.
Confusion
Monday, March 1, 2010 12:00 AM
Why don't you just reject me?
You are leaving me in a state of confoundedness
Don't leave me hanging in mid air please.
Why don't you just say everything out clearly?
It's obviously better than now.
I know you knew how i feel about you,
But as i said before , you show no signs of anything.
If you never like me , than stop helping me when i request for something.
If you like me , than show some expressions when communicating, not a straight face.
Girls are just difficult to understand........